Thursday, 26 December 2013

The year that was 2013

End of another year. Its that time of the year when one gets philosophical and starts reflecting on the year that has been. Overall this has been a good year.
This year brought about great change in my personal life that being the transition from being a software professional to a full time stay at home mum. Looking back i think it was a good decision. 
My mum celebrated her 60th birthday in march this year.. a milestone achieved.  Here's hoping she celebrates many more such milestones.
June saw my daughter start her schooling. As she stood in front of me wearing school uniform for the first time I couldn't help but wonder when my baby grew so big.  And I felt so proud.  Here's wishing my baby good luck for a wonderful academic life ahead.
In September  my daughter experienced Ganesh chaturti celebration in my native village in Goa for the first time in her life and thoroughly enjoyed it.  September also saw my daughter turn 3. Yet another milestone. November brought about the festival of lights diwali. Again something Anagha thoroughly enjoyed.  Though these festivals happen every year, this year they were special due to Anagha's participation and hence deserve a mention in the year's summary.
November saw a trip to kerala. Though it was partly spoilt by the strike situation due to which we missed out on much of  the site seeing Anagha totally enjoyed the elephant ride and houseboat stay which made the trip memorable.
December saw my cousin Sharvari's wedding in Mumbai as an occasion to meet and catch up with cousins after years followed by a trip to Goa. Hubby is out of the country on a work trip and so thoroughly conspicuous by his absence.
Today is 31st and here I am celebrating the new year with my parents,  sister and family. Feeling partly emotional as sister is relocating out of the country so it might be long before we celebrate together as a family again.
Anyways here's hoping the new year ushers in good health, happiness and cheer to everyone.  Happy New Year !!!

Friday, 20 December 2013

Just a housewife?

Yesterday I met an ex colleague of mine first time after I quit work.  When she saw me the first thing she exclaimed was "oh you have become so thin I expected you would have put on some weight since you are now relaxing at home". Though those were not her exact words what she meant was roughly on the same lines. 
How do I deal with people who think being a full time mum is less taxing than a job in the software industry?  
My typical day begins at 6:30 AM when I rush to prepare breakfast.  After hubby leaves for work at 7:45 AM it’s only me who has to do everything right from brushing my daughter's teeth to feeding her breakfast and bathing her. Only I know how daunting each of these tasks is. Rest of the morning is largely spent in cooking, getting my daughter dressed and dropping her to school. After a quick lunch I rush to pick up Anagha from school followed by chores like getting her changed, feeding her lunch and putting her to sleep after which I am so exhausted that I have to take a nap. Evenings are spent in again feeding Anagha, taking her out to play and dinner preparation. And of course in between there are miscellaneous chores like folding clothes, filling water, watering the plants, etc. By the time I am ready to hit the sack I am completely drained out and have zero energy left so where is the question of relaxing at home?
What people do not realise is that in an office job the work hours are fixed, you get paid holidays/vacations, weekends off and a heavy pay packet.  I work from morning to night with no weekend offs and no salary or appreciation for good work and yet people think I am relaxing at home. Forget appreciation, one badly cooked meal and I am at the receiving end.  Does it bother me that a very highly paid successful professional at one time, now I am reduced to doing mundane work?  Yes sometimes it does. I feel like I am losing my identity, I feel the urge to go out and do something.  So do I want to go to the lifestyle I had when I was working full time? Certainly not!

When I quit my full time job, I had this notion of that I am doing this for my daughter, I will be able to raise my child my way. To some extent I have been successful and my daughter has certainly started bonding with me much better than before. And I definitely feel relaxed not having to constantly worry about deadlines, take client calls at odd hours and having the freedom to do what I want and when I want. So then why am I complaining? I guess because it is human tendency to never be satisfied and always complain.  The grass is definitely greener on the other side of the fence.